Hana Shafi Bath Salts, What The Fuck?

So in the last few weeks, or months (stress has destroyed my perception of time), I’ve been hearing about people eating other people’s faces and consuming live dogs and all kinds of crazy shit. And then I scroll down these articles about said face-eating and I keep seeing two words: bath salts.

So apparently, there’s this new drug called “bath salts.” No, it’s not people literally buying lavender bath foaming bead crap and then eating it. It’s actually some kind of fucked up concoction of chemicals that I can’t explain to you because I’m not a scientist or a drug dealer specialized in bath salts, sorry. 

So all the flower-power kids way-back-when were taking LSD to expand their minds or enjoy some psychedelic tunes or whatever the reason was, and then disco became popular and everyone was into cocaine, and then some sketchy crack stuff made its way into the 80s, and now apparently we dig bath salts. 

Okay, probably not. We all know that news has this awful tendency to exploit and sensationalize a few isolated incidents and then call it some kind of epidemic or increasing “trend” (without actually defining what qualifies as a trend). But I find myself wondering whether I’ll actually be seeing more news reports about some zombie apocalypse-type bath salt shit going down and then in 50 years everyone will be saying “heyyyy remember when those fucked up 2k12-ers were taking bath salts??” Mind you, this contemplation generally stems from boredom and procrastination, but it’s interesting to think about. 

And if this drug actually does induce fucked up cannibalistic behaviour, then maybe the bigger issue to report on is why anyone is taking it in the first place? Or how such a twisted drug came into circulation in the first place?

Of course, heroin and meth aren’t exactly safe, but overdoses and use of them by celebrities, especially, has become something almost “normal” to hear about in the news, whereas bath salts just leave the general public asking “what the fuck?” 

All I’m saying is, it’s worth some further analysis. In the mean time, I’m officially turned off of the normal type of aromatherapy bath salts as it nows conjures up scenes worthy of the Walking Dead: gnawing zombie teeth, flesh-ripping, and all. Gross. 

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