With the ambivalent justice provoked by political correctness, juxtaposed with the ideals of freedom of speech, our society has been left with vague definitions and language barriers. Recently, a friend spoke to me about the troubles he’s been having with his girlfriend – and if only to prove the point of the overly serious first sentence – he didn’t seem to understand the difference between breaking up with someone vs. taking a break. It didn’t take much interrogation to find out that his girlfriend had chosen the latter of the two (a seemingly lesser of two evils).
It was really only then that I began to ponder the differences (and similarities). And since he seemed overtly distraught, I felt it my duty to climb aboard team friendship and help sail him into clearer waters.
What IS the difference between breaking up with someone and just taking a break? On the surface, the former sounds permanent, and the second sounds depressingly hopeful. But when you dig deeper into the holes of uncertainty, it’s without question that one is really a fucking sneaky minion of the other.
An official “break up” is very transparent and unambiguous. There’s just simply no if, ands, or buts (unless you’re referring to “butts”, which of course there’s usually much more to cum). You know then and there, without a hint of uncertainty, that the relationship you were once a part of is now non-existent. As soon as someone suggests “taking a break”, however, it is fully understood that the hopeful twinkle in your eye will be viscously raped until the day they return to you.
Now, what about the rules governing the “taking a break” stage? There have to be differences between the two, otherwise we’re just being suckered into a less harsh version of the former. Well, voice in my head, this is where definition and clarification are valuable. Taking a break should imply a person’s desire to put themself in a situation where they can reflect upon their life/relationship and see what’s important to them at this juncture in their career as a human. Not to mention the tentative promise of returning; this is a very reasonable and sensible decision to aid in determining the future of a couple. Unfortunately, there always seems to be a wild card, a real wild fucking card that can fuck up any relationship between two previously fucking individuals: “Does this mean we can see other people?”
The answer should be invariably, “No”. If someone can believe that taking a break from their partner (and again, this implies potentially returning) includes the act of trying other male and female genitalia along the way is a tall tale sign that your partner is not actually interested in returning. If they still claim to have the desire to return (again, inherent in the phrase “taking a break”) then how the fuck does fucking someone else help your decision to return to your original partner? It doesn’t!!! The only conceivable difference between your version of taking a break and breaking up for good is a matter of your tautological idiocy. And after all is said and fucked, who in their right mind, would take back an individual that needed to sleep around to find the answers to their relationship problems – a veritable whore’s guide to relationship issues (“whore”, of course, is used both in the masculine and feminine sense).
By no means am I oppressing the innate desire to mess around with other people (after all, mammals’ DNA has polygamy written all over it) I’m simply confessing the need for honesty when choosing words that directly influence other people. It’s certainly easier to quote current societal phrases that deal with common human problems, but with a little honesty, and some brave expression, many confused individuals will be, well, less confused.
In retrospect, standing for several minutes in front of my friend while I implicitly postulated the differences between the two situations was probably not very helpful. No matter how much reason and logic a person can bring to a relationship, the answer is usually found on Facebook, conveniently stashed in someone’s relationship status.