Friends with benefits sounds like an enticing term. The simple way of viewing is that are friends are nice and benefits are nice too. But it seems that most people are torn when it comes to the friends with benefits scenario. Some are convinced it’s the perfect situation, eager to find a person who they can create that dynamic with. Others believe that it will only ever lead to disaster, starting out as all fun and games and great sex, but ending with emotional complications and ruined friendships.
So is it worth the risk? On one hand, achieving the friends with benefits status gives you a lot of, well... benefits. You have a go-to person that you know and trust and that, I’m assuming, provides great sexual pleasure. But you’re not obligated to commit to them in any way, there are no dates or anniversaries to remember and no angry phone calls at night if one of you is caught winding and grinding with someone at whatshisface’s party. It seems like the ultimate, laid back, totally chill scenario.
But the potential for complications boils down to an even deeper question: can sex be devoid of emotional attachment? It differs for everyone of course, but when posed with “would you ever do a friends with benefits thing” question, many worry that even if the hook-ups begin with minimal emotional attachment or romantic interest, feelings may suddenly develop. The complicated part is mainly in the conundrum that one person might begin to feel a romantic interest while the other is completely satisfied with the no strings attached arrangement. Is this inevitable? Is it possible for two people to be compatible as friends, have sexual attraction, but not end up floating into the realm of romance and love?
The truth is that there is no sure answer, and no guarantee that a friends with benefit scenario won’t go sour. The key is knowing yourself, what you want and how you deal with sex and emotional attachment; having a good idea of how that other person deals with it, and, of course, assessing the risk and seeing if its worth it. If its a lifelong friendship that you’d never be able to live without, becoming fuck buddies may not be the wisest choice.
There’s also the movie ending, where BOTH fuck buddies mutually fall in love with each other. But I wouldn’t rely on that ending. It turns out that fuck buddies, like love, is a fickle thing too.