Kyle Towers Happy steak & blowjob day!

How was your Valentine’s Day, ladies? Did your handsome and thoughtful boyfriend pamper you and make you feel special and appreciated? Did you get your little teddy bears and chocolate covered blood diamonds? Good. I’m glad to hear it. Because now you have a chance to return all those favours...

On March 14th it is Steak & Blowjob Day- the day when men get theirs. On this most glorious day men are to receive exactly what the title suggests. There is no confusion. There are no letdowns. Instead of playing some sick guessing game as to what the other wants it is all laid out in front of you.

I know, it sounds exactly like something yours truly would fabricate, but just because it can’t be found in traditional calendars does not mean it doesn’t exist. Go ask your girlfriends. Not the uptight one who used to go to Lilith Fair. Go ask the fun and liberal ones. They know what I’m talking about. Plus, there is plenty of evidence supporting its actuality all over the internet.

And Cupid totally supports this day. In fact, he and Eros give each other high fives every time a man gets a BJ while eating a steak.

So mark it in your calendar. It would blow your man’s mind. And come next Valentine’s Day you can be sure you’ll get yours even better than the last time around.

You're welcome, fellas.

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