My friend's birthday is coming up, and he was telling about how a buddy of ours offered to go with him for a massage.
Immediately, I asked "with a happy ending?" I'm so witty sometimes.
Truthfully, I'd love a regular massage. My shoulders are sore as fuck and I have some hardcore neck tightness. But the idea of getting "a massage" is so strongly linked with the concept of a "happy ending" that I'd feel weird telling people about it.
"I went for a massaged the other day, and it was amazing. I feel fantastic."
"Oh, I bet you do ;)"
Goddammit! It certainly doesn't help that the entire world seems to agree with me. To test my theory, I googled "Massage Toronto" and my first result was "Exotic Erotic Massage Toronto." The site had a roster of ladies which you could view, so that when you went for your massage, you could request which attendant you wanted. Hot.
I read some reviews of other parlors online, and there were several by women who got a happy ending with the help of a buff male masseuse too. So my question is, if it's so fucking easy for massages to offer "happy endings," why stop there? I mean, a massage is a pleasant experience on its own: why not alleviate boring tasks with some happy finish treatment?
At this dental office, we pull more than teeth.
Mr. Lube: when you need to change your "oil."
Subway: Eat healthy, burn calories.
It's not prostitution...it's a happy ending. And who doesn't love happy