Victor Padula Problem Solved: Global Poverty Pt. 2

The international blight that is global poverty has long been a huge pre-occupation for academics, politicians and semi-retarded pop stars alike. Some people have tried to address this issue because they really care about the world’s disenfranchised, others were just getting sick of seeing those World Vision commercials on TV.

Whatever their motives, most of the major players have been able to agree on one simple goal: lifting the world’s poorest people out of poverty while— at the same time— ensuring that our western lifestyle remains far superior to those of God’s unluckiest children.

As the academics have run out of steam, alternative solutions to this problem have been coming from the most unlikely of sources. It turns out that the lateral thinking applied by experts from a number of surprising disciplines have proven infinitely useful to resolving this issue once and for all.

Hollywood:

If Hollywood movies have taught me anything it’s that if you’re convinced that somebody is evil, you don’t really give a shit what happens to them. They might fall into a giant industrial meat grinder, they might get burned alive in a hospital fire— whatever fate befalls them, you can sit back and enjoy the movie knowing that they deserved exactly what they got.

If we can just successfully recast the people of the developing world as evil, we can all sleep soundly in our large, comfortable beds, confident in the knowledge that all is right in the world. We’ve already done a pretty good job of this with the middle-east, and no one’s really fond of North Korea either. If we can only figure out how to get some photos of some starving Sudanese kids looking around suspiciously while they stroke an albino cat, I think we’re golden.

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