Liam Montgomery Re-inventing the vampire

Why the fuck do screen writes and authors feel the need to add new modifying terms to an already super awesome character? I understand the need to keep expanding on a topic to keep interest in it, but this is getting ridiculous. For example, in Blade 2 there's a super developed race of vampires with three-way jaws that feed on the regular vampires. We’ve all seen the old school Nosferatu type, so to keep it fresh someone thought they would ramp up the wow factor with ghoulish leech faced mutants, not vampires.

The thing that really gets me about all of this is that these authors act like they are the authority on the subject when they create a new modifier. "Well you know that the Vampire, is just an infected being inflicted by some mutant flu virus, that was first given to a human in the Congo by a vampire bat." Uh, what? Will Smith single handed dismantled the vampire-walking dead myth and history in I Am Legend. Apparently wooden stakes kill these guys because it lets air into their bloodstream. Somehow metal ones don’t. Just FYI. This re-vamping is changing all sorts of fucking things, like these creatures' vulnerability to sunlight. In the abysmally bad Day Breakers, a combination of water and sunlight is actually the cure to vampirism, but you still get to be super strong when you turn back quasihuman. In Twilight, the vampires glitter like diamonds in the sun, and they just don’t go out during the day because they don’t want to be exposed for what they are. Fuck that! Vampires want to eat your face, and they're already sexy. We don’t need to go around bejewelling them

There is nothing that imaginative or creative about these plot lines. I’m sorry but it’s not that hard to take an already established character, plot, or theme and give it laser pistols and set it on the moon. Bra-fucking-vo! But, I guess all of this myth is borrowed from somewhere else; Stoker’s Dracula originates from some crazy motherfucker in the 14th century named Vlad the Impaler, who would create forests of impaled armies outside of his targeted city. There was this countess in the 1600’s named Elizabeth Bathory who fucking bathed in the blood of virgins. That is fucking bad ass, impaling entire armies and bleeding out hotties is enough for a movie, we don’t need three-way jawed bejewelled vampires. Fact is way more fucked than fiction

Comments

Well, I just purchased the secnod book on Kindle on the 24th and finished it last Friday. I went to purchase the third volume and it wasn't available. I found your blog through a Google search. I am disappointed I can't get the Kindle version for my iPhone, but I bought the hard copy so that I can see how it ends (as it was originally written). I guess I was caught in the middle of all of this. No worries, I really like this trilogy so far. I would say you are on par with Brian Keene (author of The Rising and City of the Dead) as a master of the genre. Good luck with Tor. I hope to read more from you in the future. WillWillHull(dot)com

>Wow, I am surprised Winter's not all over this. Wait, do you two know each other? Uh, aynway 1. Favorite Vampire The Count from Sesame Street, Count Dracula or Count Chocula?The Count from Sesame Street all the way! I love to laugh like him ah-ah-ah-ah-ahhhh 2. Which do you prefer to bite or to be bitten?I'm an equal opportunity nibblist. 3. What's the best way to kill a Vampire?Celine Dion 4. Finish the sentence, I vant to suck your . Do you really have to ask? This IS me we're talking about.

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