Jennifer Rose Things to Tweet About Other than the Weather

As summer comes to a close (it’s August guys, it’s like, pretty much done) it’s only natural that 99% of Canadians will find themselves unable to talk about anything other than, well, this seismic environmental shift we call “fall”. I foresee the following tweet in your future: “OMG I had to wear a sweater to work this morning #BRR.” There, I said it. Now you don’t have to tweet it.

I get it guys, it’s only natural. It’s a sickness. If Idle Hands were made today, Devon Sawa would be a Canadian, unable to stop using social media to express his outrage that the daily high temperature has dipped below 18˚C.

So before we venture into the Autumn season let’s get one thing out of the way: we’re aware of the weather. Like a house cat I live in constant fear of being rained on, so I have not one, but two iPhone apps for this purpose. However, most news websites have a constant ticker featuring current and future weather, oh, and those nifty things called “windows.”

But for those of you that are slightly more conversationally challenged, here are a few other topics for you to talk, tweet or send OkCupid messages about:

1. How drunk you got last night (Bonus: This article doubles as an excuse to get drunk)
2. The ins and outs of your day (Because seriously, that would be more interesting)
3. Shit Your Second Uncle Thrice Removed Says (No one’s done that one yet right?)
4. How much you hate Twitter, Facebook, Reddit, etc. (JK – No one hates Reddit)
5. Your opinion on themes commonly found in contemporary literature, and how they relate to a possible resurgence of neo-classical realism (No,  seriously, I would probably marry you)
6. How many tweets it took for (INSERT FAMOUS PERSON HERE) to follow you back on Twitter

Give it a go! Think up your own exciting, non-weather related topics of conversation. I promise it’s a ton of fun. But mostly, do it because if I happen to read your “putting on socks for the first time in months” tweet, I will slap you.

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