Liam Montgomery That's a BIG urethra*

Everyman, (minus Lexington Steele) is obsessed with the proportions of their manhood. This obsession for some is almost all encompassing, from standing in the mirror with a boner trying to see if flexing makes it bigger, rulers, measuring tapes, to comparing your hand to the dude next to you at the bar.

Men care not only to be the golden member to which all women flock to with an insatiable lust but they want to be able to walk around their stomping grounds with their balls swanging. To be uncontested by other male primates because all others know that you have the biggest cock. Grunt, any vagina is mine, war face.    

Public washrooms become a literal pissing contest, a bunch of dudes trying to piss like a race horse. Have you ever seen a race horse piss? Their cocks are huge to be able have a stream like that. Piss harder than the guy next to you and you get to walk around like you own the place. Assert your dominant stream and the weak peon will become recessive. You know you get to us the sink first, dry your hands and shit.

Bring a new girl home and go to the bathroom with the door open. Really engage your core to force that urine from your bladder, maybe even keep you toilet half full so the stream can break and make a real strong splattering sound. Save an extra couple of shakes for the end for a long lasting effect. Have that girl on the couch thinking to herself, “oh my, that is a big urethra. I should take my clothes off.” 

Men do it, I’m serious, all types of weird shit. Get a bunch of dudes together and undoubtedly the conversation will run into cocks and inches.

Add new comment

Plain text

  • No HTML tags allowed.
  • Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically.
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.