Michael Turnbull Why you should be fat

In my day I've seen game. I have seen girls reject a man, and then come running back. Bitch him out for banging her roommate, and still go back. There are enough women that are willing to throw themselves back to their boring, asshole boyfriends because there isn't enough decent competition out there to win her interest.

So do me a favour. Get fat.

Get fat as hell. I want you to be insecure about your body, believe that you can't pick up women because you have no self esteem. I want you to freak out when a girl gives you the time of day, and I want you to buy her drinks, 30 drinks, down them and then watch her walk back to me while you still think you had a shot.

I want you to tell your friends you had a shot, and I want you to lie to yourself, because every time you tell yourself that you are in a dry spell, or that she was a bitch, means that that girl is still available for the sharks. The guppies bow out so that the predators of the ocean can move in.

It's sad truthfully. It's pathetic.
You know that when you walk away from the girl you want, you throw away a piece of yourself as well. You give up a piece of your soul. Try and work your charm: if you get turned down, just brush that dirt off your shoulder. Don't get me wrong, there are girls who won't chill with you, and there are girls that won't like you, but they should never be labelled as 'almost had that.'

Stop worrying about the ones that got away, or the ones you want that aren't interested. On to the next. There are so many dudes that just leave the race, and these girls are looking to be found.


This was my favorite article before I even started writing for SANS. I showed it to all of my friends.

It's actually flawless.

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